‘Love doesn’t run of batteries. The more you give, the more you have’ said the carefully written handwriting in the birthday card, given to Jacob* by her foster carer Megan, or as she is affectionately known to the family – Megu.
“It was a lovely process”, explains adopter Dani when I ask her about the transition process of Jacob from foster care to permanent adoption.
“During introductions we used to just stay up late chatting, really talking through any thing I had on my mind. She had so much time for us”, she continues.
Extended Family
“I didn’t just find my child, I also found an extended family” Dani concludes.
It was 4 years ago in June that Jacob was successfully placed with Dani. There have been challenges along the way of course, the path has been far from straight forward.
Is it ever?
And at the risk of getting overly reflective, would we want it to be?
“We meet every month and Megu celebrates everything with us. Christmas, birthdays. She’s retired now which is a shame, but she’s given us the most love anyone could have given us.”
At this point in the phone call Dani passes the phone to Jacob asking him to say what he thinks of Megu and partner.
“We love you Megu!” my phones speaker broadcasts loudly into my living room.
Making life a little easier
Megan may have retired but she is one of many foster carers in Wales who play a vital role in providing children with stability, routine and of course love on their path to permanency and adoption.
The past two weeks have been Foster Fortnight, which aims to shine a light on these fantastic people, celebrating what positive differences they make in a child’s life.
“We’ve had so many clothes, toys and blankets from Megu as part of the induction. It these little things that really help”, says Dani.
“There have been many complexities with Jacob, and what I needed more than anything, at times, was a friend to help. Meg provided that. She still does.”
“When my partner went back to work”, continues Dani “Megan was on the phone straight away. Key milestones that she was aware of. Megan was there.”
“She has become a proper grandmother” Dani concludes.
Dani starts to talk about a book that Megan gave her as a present, You Can Never Run Out Of Love by Helen Docherty and Ali Pye. The inspiration for the quote in the birthday card came from this book.
You can’t measure love in a bucket or cup. You don’t have to worry you’ll use it all up.
Because love’s not a game where you have to keep score. Whenever you give some, you’ll always have more.
When you’ve run out of everything else you’ll still find . . .
You can never run out of love.
Dani chose Western Bay Adoption Service due to the positive experiences of one of her colleagues and also because she wanted to tap into to the local support networks available to her.
Interested in adoption? We’d love to hear from you!
*All names have been changed to protect identities.